"Maybe it's human nature to think one's own situation is the unique and incomparable one, the transcendent exception." Sue Monk Kidd, "The Mermaid Chair"
I always had the tendency to believe that if I was going through any tragedy or crisis, I was certainly walking through that valley alone. Surely, no one could possibly know anything of my doubts, traumas, insecurities, guilt, fears, etc. Wasn't possible. Everyone else was very well-balanced and functional, except for me. It wasn't until I did some extensive counseling and research in my early 30's that I found out that hey, by golly, we all suffer! And I also now find it quite humorous to think that I alone felt that I must have been chosen to be a martyr of sorts (listen to Tori Amos' "Crucify Ourselves" sometime). What really helps the sufferer is honesty. Brutal honesty with one's friends and family (or a counselor in lieu of the others); not keeping all the hurt inside and feeling like we're alone in our sadness and grief - because we're not.
It is like an unbelievable lightness to tell someone something painfully truthful and be vulnerable - and still be loved and understood. And sometimes, miraculously, you find out that they've been feeling the same way, or that they once experienced the same thing. I think that's why I prefer to be around "real" people who have some issues, faults, problems, etc.
I hate "perfect" people - and we all know who they are. The ones who don't drink, smoke, dance, have bad thoughts, have perfect posture, never overeat, have never inhaled, never broken a promise, never call out sick when they're not, their marriages are perfect, ("Oh! We never argue!), never missed a soccer game, their makeup's always perfect, they only eat "soy" things, etc. The visual image that I have for "them" is that of a Stepford Wife, or it could be a Stepford Husband for that matter (appropriately named Skippy or Biff.) I hate them because they're liars. I hate them because I can't trust them. They're the ones, who shall remain nameless in this blog, who are preaching on TV on Sundays, and then hiring gay prostitutes on Friday nights; the happily married men who engage young boys in sex on the Internet, or the perfect little miss size 3 who insists on telling us Fatimas how we should all diet and exercise, when they smoke in order to stay skinny...........(???); or the bored perfect mother and housewife who is boffing her personal trainer - but damn her house looks perfect!
C'mon folks - let's just be honest - we all have our issues and we need to get them out of our closets and off our tongues. Let it go. Just let it all go...............
I'm big on quotes. You'll find that out. Some are meaningful; others just pithy.
"When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be." Lao Tzu
So, today I went and did Yoga because I let go of Fatima for an hour and became a "yoga chick" just for one hour - and enjoyed the hell out of it!
Let go! Fatima
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